Nipple Stimulation, Castor Oil and a Half Rack of Ribs

Caroline has officially entered the Wives’ Tale portion of her pregnancy.

Hi everyone. My name is John Cave Osborne and I’m married to the lovely and charming Caroline. And I’d like to welcome you to the Wives’ Tale portion of her much ballyhooed pregnancy. Though she would probably refer to it as the Something’s Gotta Give portion. Because, well, something’s gotta give with this kid.

I mean for days now we’ve been living under “any minute” status. Yet for days now? Nothing. Zip. Nada.  And it’s starting to feel as if we’re Waiting for Godot over here. Caroline? She’s had about enough of it. As such, she’s been consulting various wives’ tales in hopes of enticing the little fella out of her womb, dropping said wives’ tales (out of nowhere) in casual conversation as if they were as ordinary as items on our grocery list.

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