What to Expect When You’re NOT Expecting: Old, Tired, Pregnant and Surprised

Hard to believe we're adding one more to this posse.

When my wife and I first got married, there was no question that we wanted to have a child. However, that’s exactly what I wanted—a child. Caroline? She wanted two.

Turned out she was carrying the number we both wanted. Combined. Which, of course, tabled our debate. Thanks to my stepdaughter, the triplets meant a second, third and fourth child. And the only fifth we were interested in was in our liquor cabinet. You know, to occasionally calm the nerves which four kids were sure to rattle.

But you know what?

Read the rest at Man of the House (You kinda have to b/c it’s my birthday. Please?!)

Bristol Palin, Dieting Babies and Elmo

Ah, Elmo. My old nemesis.

I promise that one day I’ll get used to the amount of writing I’m doing outside my personal blog and resume posting here as often as I once did. One day, soon, at that.

If for no other reason than because this is my favorite place to write. After all, it’s 100% me. That’s not to say I don’t like writing for other sites. I do. It’s just that at other places, I sometimes cover topics I may not have chosen to write about here.

However, much of what I write for other sites is stuff that I find interesting. What’s more, I think you might, too. So every Saturday, I’m going to (try to) put up a post here with links to my favorite non-JCO posts from the week prior. All of these curation posts, if you will, are categorized under “Babbling,” a new category you may have noticed in my toolbar.

Of the 10 posts I wrote at Babble this past week, three stand out. One of them has my favorite title, ever. Sadly, it’s about complete morons who subject their babies to diets.

Does This Onesie Make My Baby’s Butt Look Big?

Another is about an unlikely battle of wits. Bristol Palin versus Keith Olbermann. With a guest appearance made by the Situation.

Bristol Palin to Keith Olbermann: I’m Perfectly Qualified To Advocate Teen Abstinence

The third Babble post I liked? I poked fun at myself via a truly horrendous yuletide picture of my family taken last year.

Tis the Season for Awkward Family Photos: Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha, Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha

I liked my post at Man Of The House so much that I actually posted the first part of it here. It’s about my dad, who’s undoubtably enjoying his first holiday in Heaven with my sister Holliday. I’ve linked it again, in case you missed it.

Thanks, Dad: Determination, Strength and Dignity

And my efforts at the Good Men Project’s “Dad’s Good” (no so into the name “Dad’s Good”) are two oldies but goodies. One is a tender account of the night my 2 year-old comforted me for a change. If you read it, you’ll think I’m a woman.

Monster’s Scared

The other is a scathing letter to Elmo. If you read it, you’ll think I’m a jerk. Or that I hate Elmo. Possibly both.

Dear Elmo

My Late Father

Me and my parents a month or two before Dad died.

I was recently asked if I wanted to contribute to a series called “Thanks, Dad,” over at ManOfTheHouse. I jumped at the opportunity, even though I knew that in many ways, the exercise would prove to be a difficult and emotional one.

I was wrong. It wasn’t difficult. But I was also right, as it proved to be an extremely emotional endeavor. That said, I’m so glad I wrote it. I was happier still to share it with Mom on Thanksgiving Day. It was invigorating to feel Dad’s spirit as we sat around the table.

I hope you’ll take time to read it. I think you’ll like it. It may even spark some memories of someone you love who’s no longer with us. If it does, I hope you’ll share some of those memories with me via a comment. After all, it’s the holiday season. And there’s no better time than now to reflect upon the people we love.

Here it is:

*  *  *

Early one morning in 2002, my brother picked me up from the airport and drove me to the hospital to see my dad. He had been unresponsive since the afternoon before. His rapid turn for the worse was what had prompted the previous night’s phone calls urging me to catch a cross-country flight – if I ever wanted to see him alive again.

The second I walked into his room, I was devastated. So that’s what it looks like, I thought, with equal amounts of fear and awe. It was dehumanizing. Which made sense to me. What was happening to Dad is what sets our spirit free. And our spirit isn’t human.

I sensed that though he was still with us, he was gone nonetheless. But I was wrong. Dad came back to us later that very day. Shortly after he regained consciousness, he told Mom something she’ll never forget.

“I died last night, Martha Lee.”

read more at ManOfTheHouse

World’s Greatest Dad

No. I'M the world's greatest dad. You're just some punk about the scream "uncle."

Greetings, all. My “Where’s Mommy?” video has been entered in a contest put on by a the fantastic folks over at Man of the House — the “World’s Greatest Dad” contest. And while I don’t even consider myself the greatest dad i my neighborhood, much less my world, I am hoping to win. Why? Because if I do, I’m donating 100% of the prize money to charity.

And that means that ChildHelp.org — a leading national nonprofit which benefits victims of child abuse and neglect — would get $2,000.00. In this depressed economy, I know each donation is valued even that much more. So please help me raise a nice chunk of change for a great cause without so much as spending a dime!

This will literally take you five seconds. Two keystrokes. First, click this link to get to my video:

http://manofthehouse.com/greatest-dad-contest/entry/3f16f392e303513a

Then click on the “vote” icon. BOOM. Done.

You can vote one time per day between now and October 22, so I hope you’ll vote a few times between now and then. And if you like this idea of donating two grand to a foundation which helps children who really need it in communities all across the country, then I hope you’ll share this post with your network of friends via one of the social network icons that appear on the left side of this page.

Thanks, y’all!

PS — Like my new look? Hope so. PJ Mullen, the good man behind Real Men Drive Minivans, is to thank for it. If your site needs a facelift, he comes with my highest recommendation. Don’t forget to grab my feed if you wanna keep following me. Though I have the same address, the feed did change. Same thing if you were getting posts delivered to you via email! Thanks for reading!

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