Top 10 Advantages to Being an Older Parent

C holding GF — and there really are a lot of advantages to being an older parent.

One site I really enjoy writing for is TLC’s Parentables because one of the people I blog alongside is Kate Gosselin. Which means that I’m obviously this close to getting my own reality TV show. Only we’re not gonna have any more kids, and five’s not that remarkable, so I’ll probably need a catchy title. Hmm. Ain’t no Maybes. No More Babies? Close, but not quite. Let’s see… Even if we Tried, Her Tubes Are Tied? But her tubes aren’t tied, so that doesn’t make sense. How ’bout No More Trips ‘Cause John’s Gettin Snipped? (Incidentally, I got those titles from a tongue-in-cheek post I wrote in Jan of 2010 about how C and I would never have any more children, a post I called Get Real. Eerie, no?)

Regardless, I hope you’ll click through to check out two posts I recently wrote for them. The first one’s supposed to be ha-ha and the second one opens me up to ridicule because who am I to tell you what you should and should not discuss with your kids? Still, I did it anyway. Just because, I suppose. In any event, here they are, should you want to check them out. Look for original content on this blog tomorrow…

Top 10 Advantages to Being an Older Parent and
7 Things Every Parent Should Discuss with Their Kids and 3 Things They Absolutely Should Not

Picture of the Weekend, Aiming Low and One of the Girls

Not only did we survive another weekend, but we also managed to snap this great picture of Kirby holding her baby brother. Isn’t it cute? If only every moment of the adjusting phase were filled with such cuteness. The picture is pretty much a tease, though, because it’s the only original content I have in today’s effort. Not a lotta writing going on this weekend.

Well, I did write one thing, but it’s for Aiming Low — a fantastically clever and funny website that I’m extremely fired up to write for. So as a way of celebrating my new association with them, I’m re-posting an old post that has an Aiming Low connection, albeit a tenuous one. You see, one of the Aiming Low writers is an extremely talented and versatile woman named Schmutzie. And one of the many things she does is share great writing with her readers each and every week via a feature of her blog known as Five Star Friday. Last year, I made the cut with a post I wrote called One of the Girls. If you’re down for reading, click read more and you’ll see it after the jump. Oh. And real quick? It should be noted that the entire post was written tongue-in-cheek and that I absolutely LOVE the woman I refer to as Cindy. Okay, without further ado…

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My Pregnant Wife is the Amy Winehouse of Nesting

That crib looks like shit there. — Right as always, Amy. Right as always. Image: judacoregio‘s photostream via Creative Commons

Caroline’s been on this hardcore nesting bender for like 12 seeks now which, when you think about it, kinda makes her the Amy Winehouse of nesting. For example, just last Saturday she woke me up at 6:30 in the morning with the following comment: “I don’t think we should put this year’s Christmas tree where we put it last year. I think we should move it to where we had it the year before instead.” And while that may have been disconcerting, it was nothing compared to the online extravaganza she embarked upon just two hours later when she decided to knock out a little Christmas shopping. (Send. Help. Now.)

Anyway, I blogged about it a bit ago and today, the fine folks at GoodMenProject are running it on their site. To read it, please click here. (But don’t forget to send help.)

The 6 Axioms of Step Parenting

Anyone who stops by here on a regular basis would likely agree that I’ve never once professed to be an expert at anything, much less parenting. That said, I’m like everyone else in that I try hard to do well at most any thing that I do. And parenting is a great example.

So, too, is step parenting. I’ve written a handful of times about our blended family experience (with a couple of those efforts even getting linked up over at the Huffington Post’s Divorce section), and today, over at TLC, I decided to write about it once again, but this time with a different slant.

This time, I decided to write about 6 different axioms I try to keep in mind when it comes to step parenting. If you’d like to check it out, please visit me over at TLC’s Parentables.

JCO One of BlogHer’s Voices of the Year?

I Already Have a Daughter. Who Do You Think Let Me Marry My Wife?

JCO one of BlogHer‘s Voices of the Year? Sounds a bit out there, right? At least it did to me when I first realized (thanks to a random comment) that one of my Babble posts had been nominated. After doing a little digging I learned it was more than one. Turns out that nine of my Babble posts had been nominated across three different categories. So for all you people who think I’m only good for the Ha-Ha (little pet peeve of mine…), please note that not only was I nominated in the Humor category, but also in the Life and Perspective categories too.

So there.

No word  yet on the Short and Kinda Bald category, but I’ve got my fingers crossed.

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If Pop Songs Were Written For Toddlers: The Potty Training Edition

Image: ceedub13 via Creative Commons 2.0

Yeah. Okay. So we’re sorta rockin’ potty jokes today. Better than Weiner jokes, I suppose. Hope TLC doesn’t mind! Oh well. Too late now, I guess, because I went ahead and posted it on their website, Parentables. The post is basically a story about how I used to sing to the triplets during their potty training years. If you think you’ve read it before, you may have read something similar, but this one’s got potty-altered songs I’ve yet to mention (though there is one cross-over).

As you can tell from the photo above, one of them is a Snoop Dogg song. Drop It In The Pot, of course. The others?

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5 Things I’ve Learned from My Toddler Triplets

My latest piece for TLC’s Parentable’s blog is all about our wee threesome. Namely the lessons that they’ve taught me. After all, we’re just 4 weeks from the birth of Grand Finale, and I’m sorta starting to freak out, so I thought now would be the perfect time to write something about what we learned last go round.

So if I’ve already sold you on wanting to read the post, then click here. But, if you wanna find out what the five categories are as well as see the pics I used for the actual post before you decide weather or not to click on over to Parentables, that’s fine, too. I’ve posted them after the jump.

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Dads Worth Only Half of What Moms Worth

Image: Tobyotter Creative Commons

That’s right. I said it. And if you don’t believe me, just ask your wife. She’ll tell you. So will a new survey that’s out, one which compares the fair market value of moms vs. dads. I’m not sure I’m buying it, though and I explain why in a recent piece I wrote for TLC’s blog, Parentables. It was my second post I’ve written for them and I’m fired up to be writing for them. Look for three, maybe four efforts a week from me there. Anyway, click if you wanna read either of my first two posts:

Why Summer’s Overrated. Sorta.
Dad’s: You’re Only Worth Half What Mom’s Worth. Happy Father’s Day.

But that’s not all. NO, it’s not. I’ve also got a new piece up at GoodMenProject that’s of the Father’s Day variety. So if you’re wondering what your (or your husband’s) father’s day gift says about you (or him), you might wanna click the following:

What Your Father’s Day Gift Says About You

Or, you could just read the breaking news on Congressman Weiner. Hey, that gives me a little idea…

 

My Attempt at Laundry? More Like the Dense Cycle

One of my favorite sites I write for is the GoodMenProject. They recently asked if I’d do a quick bit about laundry and I was thrilled they did. For I have very strong, albeit detached feelings about laundry and it centers around my beautiful wife’s mastery of it. It was fun to write, but then again, it’s not every day I get to use the word load. Or make parallels between my laundry life and impotence.

I know. I’m like 15. Here it is, however, should you still wanna read it:

Almost as daunting to me as going off to college was the prospect of doing my own laundry. Until I realized something, that is. Laundry’s a lay up—one I made countless times armed only with a handful of change, a box of detergent, and a rudimentary understanding of my exciting new world which was suddenly subdivided into tidy little categories defined by water temperature and fabric color.

That’s not to say I didn’t have an occasional mishap. Indeed, I did. Often it was my liberal interpretation of what, exactly, fit into the whites category. Hot water, it turns out, isn’t always as forgiving as one might like. Or so I gathered by the plethora of ambiguously pink apparel that suddenly graced my wardrobe.

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Blogging and the Grateful Dead Show Economy

I really liked that bit on carpooling, man.

This time last week, I was at the Mom 2.0 Summit in New Orleans. A while back, Jason Avant (DadCentric founder) had asked me to join him on a panel to discuss the evolution of dad blogging. Appropriately enough, the panel, itself, would evolve. Jason had to cancel. So, too, did our original mediator, Tanis Miller of Redneck Mommy fame. Nonetheless, the final lineup was formidable, indeed, consisting of BetaDad, Whit Honea (both of whom write for DadCentric in addition to other sites) and yours truly. Our mediator? The incomparable Catherine Conners (aka HerBadMother).

There was only one problem: how was I going to discuss the evolution of dad blogging when I wasn’t even sure I understood what dad blogging was to begin with?

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