Learning to give back during the holidays: the empirical edition

Two years ago now, I took my oldest and one of her friends camping to this mountain lake I love. It’s a rugged area, the campsites all primitive, steeped in nature. Steeped in beauty. We stayed for three nights. As you can imagine, there’s a lot to bring on such a trip. So much, in fact, that I didn’t have room to take any wood.

“What are we gonna do?” she asked.

“I know a place — don’t worry.” And I did. Just before the road that twists and turns to our campsite, there’s a 180-degree, right-hand turn you can make that takes you away from the water and straight up what is essentially the side of a mountain. After a quarter mile or so, the road dips down and offers a gravel drive on the left — one that cuts through a valley of sorts.

It’s here you’ll find a collection of dilapidated trailers, a few broken down cars resting upon cinderblock pillars, a mangy-looking dog or two and this:

To continue reading, click HERE.

Kirstie Alley: Marital Guru or Relentless Book Hawker?

So, hey, confession alert: I’m not the biggest fan of Kirstie Alley. Never have been. I’ve always pegged her as one of those people who would say or do anything to stay relevant. The phrase attention whore comes to mind.

Anyway, she’s got this horrible new book out and in promoting it, she’s somehow managed to slink to a new low — even for her. She’s now admitted to having emotional affairs during her marriage with men like John Travolta and Patrick Swayze, causing many to debate whether an emotional affair is as bad as a physical one.

But I’m not interested in any such debate. Because I can’t get past the part where she’s demeaned a dead man’s marriage. To read, head on over to Babble by clicking HERE.

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NYC Nanny Killings: Personalizing the Tragedy

A mom takes her three year old to a swim lesson and comes back to find that her two other children have been fatally stabbed, allegedly by the family nanny. I finish reading the story, then close out of the window and walk away from the computer, hoping it’s that simple to escape. But it’s not. It stays with me for the rest of the night.

And nothing else matters.

I go to bed, but sleep doesn’t come easily. I’m too busy thinking about the Krims.

The next morning on my way to the office, I remember something about the story — something quite inconsequential, but something that gives me pause nonetheless. The second I get in front of my desktop, I check to see if my memory has deceived me.

It has not.

Read more over at BabbleVoices by clicking HERE

“Britney Spears” Civil Trial Totally Not Civil

Like, at all. People are saying all kinds of mean things about each other.

The civil suit was filed against Britney Spears‘s handlers, as well as her parents, Jamie and Lynne Spears, by a former confidant of the Grammy winner — a clown namedSam Lufti. Remember him? I didn’t either, until I saw the pictures. Apparently unhappy with his 15 minutes of infamy, Lufti has lawyered up.

Read more at the popculture site, MamaPop by CLICKING HERE.

Some Thoughts From our Car Seats

Dear John and Caroline:

Get over yourselves.

OH, I know. Having triplets has been kinda tough. Good Lord do I ever know. It’s pretty much all y’all ever talk about.  And I get it — to an extent at least. I mean, a lot of people think buckling and unbuckling one infant multiple times throughout the day is a pain. So buckling and unbuckling three is obviously three times the hassle.

But while you strain your back to securely click in Little Darlings 1, 2 and 3, I’m not exactly whistling Dixie over here. I mean, HELLO? I’m the one who’s actually keeping your kids safe, for crying out loud. Oh, sure, you keep your trio safe, too, but in that safekeeping process at least you don’t get ABUSED like I do.

To read more, head over to Babble by CLICKING HERE

Road Trips — Man vs Wife Edition [Video]

First — WOW, hello? Blog much? Sorry for the radio silence. Crazy stretch for me lately.

But second, and more important, I’ve got a treat for you today. You know how I weaseled my way into getting paid to blog at places like Babble, TLC, YahooShine and Disney? Well, now I’ve weaseled my way into getting paid to post a few video blogs. You’ve seen some of my videos, right? Like the one where I interviewed Caroline while 36 weeks pregnant? In a bathing suit? (I do NOT recommend that any of you guys out there try that one. After all, I’m a trained professional. And a far bigger jackass than all y’all combined.)

Well, that’s what these will be like — that whole feisty banter thing we do. Kinda like Paul Reiser and Helen Hunt on Mad About You, only with a hint of southern charm, right? Anyway, there’ll be six of them between now and the end of the year. The series is called According to the Osbornes and this first one’s about road trips. GOOD. TIMES. Actually road trips aren’t much fun for us. But they are funny as you’ll see from the video. (And Caroline is puh-RICELESS in it…)

So head on over to Babble to see what I mean by CLICKING HERE.

The Triplets Are Repeating Each Other. You Copy?

We’ve reached a reasonably annoying stage here at the Osborne house. The repeating stage. You copy?

You better not. Copy, that is. Because if you do, I’ll send your ass to time out just like I did the triplets.

So lemme backup a bit and provide a little context. The triplets just turned five and I don’t know if it’s their ever expanding vocabulary or what, but it seems they’ve taken to copying each other. One of them will say something, then one of the other two will say the exact same thing, intonations and all.

So, first, they’re pretty damn good at it, the whole intonation bit being a particularly nice touch. But second, such mimicking is invariably met by the following:

Read more at BabbleVoices by clicking HERE

photo credit

Anderson Cooper Breaks Off Some Choice Words for Star Jones

Anderson Cooper has made a living out of telling people things they did not know. But on Thursday, the popular CNN and daytime host decided to mix it up a bit by telling folks something they know all too well:

Star Jones is an idiot.

Read more over at MamaPop by clicking HERE

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A Couple You Might Have Missed

I’ve been so lame about posting over here lately, but I’ll get it back together here, soon. For now, though, here are three links to pieces that you might wanna check out. Click on a headline if you’re so inclined:

High School Reunions: Tricky Little Numbers, No?
Summer Turns to Fall and I’m in a Funk
When Bad Clothes Happen to Good Babies

15 Things I’ve Learned from the Triplets

The triplets turned five this past weekend and, like any parent who watches his or her children grow up, I’m so proud of the little people they continue to become. And that’s just it — they continue to become their own little people. More and more each day, in fact.

Ever notice how I don’t really write much about Alli? I mean, sure, I’ll go 30,000 feet on her and maybe pen something like 15 Things Every Stepparent Should Know, but I don’t tell a lot of specific stories about her and the reason’s simple:

Alli’s a big girl and her stories aren’t mine to tell. There hers.

And the triplets are pretty much right there, too. That’s why I’ll continue to tell fewer and fewer stories about them the older they get. But this one’s kinda like the one about being a stepparent. It’s more about the things I’ve learned from them than it is about the triplets, themselves.

Anyway, I’m rambling, so I’ll just shut up now and drop you the link. If you ‘d like to read, head over to Disney by clicking HERE.

Photo: family friend Beth Lankler

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